FatLadyOnTheMountA hefty lady from France came within a hair’s breadth of suffocating me to death on the summit of Mount Sinai in the desert where Moses and his people wandered for forty years seeking the “Promised Land.”

Donna Sue and I had linked up with a troupe of college students from Europe to camp-tour Egypt on the cheap. Mt. Horeb (Mt. Sinai) is located within 24,000 square miles of nothing except forbidding mountains and desert. This is the accepted site where Moses received the Ten Commandments from God.

Pilgrims to the mount commonly begin the exhausting trek near sundown from St. Catherine’s Monastery at the base in order to reach the summit to catch the sunrise over this ancient land of the Bible. Not long after my group set out on the climb, a Bedouin riding a camel fell in behind Donna Sue and me. We were selected, undoubtedly, because she and I were at least 30 years older than most of the students.

“Lady want ride camel, mister?” the Bedouin asked as night fell.

“No. Thank you.”

That went on for about an hour or so, the same question every three or four minutes. He was amazingly persistent, if nothing else.

“If he says that one more time,” I groused to Donna Sue, “I’m going to drag him off that camel and stuff him—“

Use your imagination as to where I intended to stuff him.

There was no more “lady want ride camel, mister?”

We reached the summit a couple of hours before sunrise. The moon was low and only a sliver, the rugged terrain illuminated mostly by starlight. I lay down on a large flat boulder to enjoy the night. I soon dozed off, stirring only when darkness seemed to suddenly blot out the sky.

A very large rear end was posed directly above my face, shifting about like that of a hen before she settles on her nest of eggs. I couldn’t resist. I shrieked at the top of my lungs, as though in fear of my life. The poor woman almost jumped off the top of Moses’ Mount.

She spoke French. Fluently and loudly.

Charles W. Sasser is author of more than 60 books that range from history, politics, and sociology to SciFi, adventure, travel, and other subjects, including one Romance novelette. He is rather challenged when it comes to social media—but his titles may be accessed on Amazon.com, BarnesandNoble.com, and many bookstores.